Subject: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Fri Feb 17, 2012 3:57 am
Age: 14 Gender: Female Race: Kazuth Birthplace: The Nation-State of Vinberg, Occitan
Massive spoilers for her backstory follow. However, if you want to learn of the story behind the Kazuth of the White Plains, read on.
Backstory:
— Onward — She ran. She ran as fast as she could. She ran as if lives were at stake.
Because they were.
You see, it had never really been safe for a Kazuth in the North. Well, Occitan in general wasn't very safe. But in Vinberg? It may as well have been suicide. Yet, it was either her life or his. A special root grown only on the fringes of the Vinberg borders meant the difference between life and death for her ailing husband. Naturally, it would have to be just one root that would do the trick. And, naturally, it would have to be where Kazuth fear to tread. Why did he have to get this illness and not something more easily curable? she could have easily thought. But such a feeling didn't occur to her. She counted her blessings that he was alive, believing that a curable disease is better than, say, an incurable one.
Her name was Schatz. More precisely, Katherine. But it may as well have been Schatz. The Occitanian word for "treasure" fit so perfectly in her husband's eyes that he called her by that nickname every day. Now she was proving her worthiness of the moniker.
The journey was easy enough. They lived close to the far north edge of the Harian border, so it only took a three or four-day crossing of Westerwald to reach Vinberg. Two if you were rushing. And she was most certainly rushing. Two days going, two days coming. She would arrive home within four days, if all went well. And her husband would be safe. She would be well within the "seven days to live" omen granted by their physician. Smugglers would bring her in and out.
But life isn't always that simple. Fate saw fit to give her a child on the way back.
— Deliverance — The weather was unfavorable. Cold. If she bore the child outside, it likely wouldn't have survived the night. Yet, if she sought out shelter in this land, there was a chance they would both be slaughtered. But pregnancy doesn't make one reasonable.
So she knocked. One door, on one remote cottage, as close to the border as she could manage to walk. She knocked again. Perhaps this close to the border, they would be different; just different enough to feel pity. Knock knock knock. No answer. She knew they were home. She could hear the voices inside talking about her in some old Occitanian language. At least, she assumed they were talking about her. The seconds passed like hours and she was becoming increasingly desperate. She mewled.
An answer. More a sword than an answer, but the door swung open. The figure was silhoutted against the fireplace inside, wielding a sword likely meant for her. But there stood his wife...and his child...and two pleading faces...and gradually the sword was cast aside.
A gift and a curse, a gift and a curse. The gift to Katherine was kindness. The gift to the Occitanians was gratitude. Both were handed the curse of a Vinbergen Kazuth. But it was hard to see the Kazuth as a curse. It was no longer an "it" that could be slaughtered on whim. It was a she. A baby girl.
She wouldn't name her. Not yet. Not without her husband.
For now, it seemed, Katherine could rest. A foolish thought, of course. She still had her husband to return to. The hospitality would not last forever. She would be discovered.
She slept with an icy numbness, knowing full well of the uncertainty and of what little she could do to help the situation.
— Eyes — Despite the nervousness, Katherine was tired. She slept well—despite not meaning to. She intended to get a quick nap and regain her strength, but remained under Vinbergen care for the full ten hours of her rest. The hospitable mother, Marie her name, took care of the child in Katherine's unconscious absence, wary that the child's wails would alert her mother's sensitive ears to awakeness. Warmth in a blanket, lullabies of Vinberg, and the caring embrace of a mother served to soothe the child to silence.
Once awake, Katherine searched immediately for her little girl. She needn't say a thing; the eyes of mothers speak volumes. Her child was gently handed back to her and she gave thanks in return for the generosity.
She cradled her newborn as she prepared herself for the journey back. The blanket wrapped around the child was left to the child, as it would certainly need to be kept warm along the way. A meal was given to Katherine, though it was eaten hesitantly at first because she had no time to waste. But a two-day trek could hardly be made on an empty stomach, and she consumed much of her food on the way to Vinberg, underestimating the phrase "eating for two." So she ate.
It was then that she realized her ticket home would not work for two. Especially not a newborn posed to wail or mewl or make some other noise suddenly and alert border patrol of their presence among yards of cloth in the back of a carriage. They could both be killed.
Tears came easily to her face and did not go unnoticed by her hosts. They knew not what was the problem—sobs too thick to speak through—only that they were not tears of joy. Yet, in the way she clutched her child close to herself and the way she returned the gaze of the Vinbergen mother, understanding was reached.
"Her eyes say she is about to lose her child," Marie murmured to her husband in the old Occitanian dialect.
— Decision — She had no time to weep, and crying wasn't going to solve her problem. Unfortunate as the situation may have been, she had to think of a solution. Think, think!
An idea. She asked them for writing materials. An inkwell, quill, and parchment was fetched for her. She drew a crude map and a route straight to Haria. She wrote down her name: Katherine Rosenthal, and gave instructions to find some way to bring the child out of Vinberg and back to herself. She explained why she had come to Vinberg, why she needed help, pleaded with them, offered money.
Of course, those with the heart to help a troubled mother would not do so for money.
Her pleas were heartfelt and the task admittedly not difficult. All they needed to do was make the two day journey back and forth. Simple, life-saving, and all for the sake of the dear child that Marie had cared for just the previous night.
The husband wanted to say it was too troublesome, and yet couldn't. He knew his wife's stubbornness and the looks that Marie and Katherine shared. If he refused to do it, he knew that she would volunteer herself. He sighed gently.
"Ulrich, we must do something."
The gaze of the Kazuth mother locked to his. She begged, throwing herself on her knees. While it was true that he wanted to say it was too much, that there was nothing they could do, that they were not trustworthy...none of those things were true. He thought of his child and wondered if he would ask the same of a stranger were he in the same situation.
"She will be safe with us."
— Derision — They waited a day after Katherine's departure to venture out, trying to make sure that the Kazuth would be safely across the border in case the Order caught on. Marie inquired of a guardsman the morning on the day they intended to leave.
"There was an impurity wandering about. Has it been dealt with?"
"Wiped clean."
Of course, Kazuth were trickier than that, faster than that. It's likely she wasn't even spotted. But the guardsmen were trained to kill Kazuth, and trained well. She returned to her home, doubt overwhelming her. Was she really dead? Did her plan fail?
What will we do with the child?
Her worries spilled out into words and flooded her husband as he, too, was forced to bear them. He wished to comfort Marie, but logic ran its course. The Order has no reason to lie. Vinberg is not a safe place for Kazuth. No plan is perfect. Tragedies occur. The Order is everywhere. Katherine must have been killed on the way back home.
The question on both minds still remained—what of the child?—but logic and an intense quarrel eventually solved it. With Katherine dead and the father soon to die, the only reasonable option would be to take in the little nameless Kazuth. And since they couldn't very well raise the girl in Vinberg, the only reasonable option would be to move away. But could they really just pack up and leave? Was that truly a reasonable option? They hated the choice they were handed, hated it with the same hatred that the Order hated Kazuth with.
Leave their home or kill the child they helped deliver?
— Ward — They helped her up to this point. They had given Katherine food and shelter, helped deliver the baby, risked themselves for the sake of a Kazuth. It didn't make sense to turn back now, waste all of that effort, and make her death a pointless one. After all, before her death, Ulrich did make the vow: "She will be safe with us." How could a man, a father, a respectable Occitanian turn his back on a promise like that, even if she is a Kazuth?
He couldn't. Neither him nor his wife could bear the bloodguilt. There was no choice, then. The child would, for all intents and purposes, be theirs from now on.
Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Marie was already caring for her daughter, Gabrielle, and saw little wrong with the idea of caring for another. In fact (though she hadn't dared mention it to Ulrich), she had always wanted two children instead of one. One would be an example for the other and they would be able to share and play along with each other. It worked out just fine.
But they still needed to leave home.
And leave home they did—originally, they intended to stay in Occitan, but realized that it would constantly remind them of Katherine. And if they were reminded of Katherine, the child might notice. If the child noticed, she might ask questions. If she asked questions, she might not like the answers.
So they moved further. Outside of the region. Far enough to not be reminded every day of the loss, but close enough to be practical. They settled on a kingdom to the south called Sanctimonia. It seemed hospitable enough to Kazuth. They had never heard of much in the way of persecution, though that was no guarantee that it did not occur. It would have to do. They gathered their supplies, took whatever money and belongings they could fit into their carriage, then smuggled their new child out of danger.
It became impractical to refer to her simply as "the Kazuth," "the girl," and "the child." And perhaps a little disrespectful as well, they thought. Seeing that they adopted her as their own, they saw fit to give the girl a name of her own. But it had to be one that would not clash with their own, so the child would feel more welcome and less curious about her origins when she became aware enough to realize the eeriness of being raised by humans. Her name was difficult to pick. From raising her and noting her mannerisms, they thought of so many names that they couldn't simply pick one. So they narrowed it down as much as they could, and even gave her a last name of her own.
"Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle. The Kazuth of the White Plains."
— Peak — As they adventured across Occitan, their thoughts were on a town that would be safe and nice to live in, and yet not one in which the peoples would be separate, but tight-knit and friendly. They quickly passed through Westerwald, then Buchloe, making sure to ask locals along the way about Sanctimonia and the cities within. They heard much about a mountainous city populated mostly by elves. When they finally made it to Sanctimonia itself, they continued asking, and only heard more. Quiet, safe, and hospitable. It sounded perfect. The only drawback was that it was atop a mountain and they would need to take a long and winding path to get there. But no place is without drawbacks, and this was not a particularly large drawback. It at least explained why the town was so small.
It took longer to reach Leyenara than expected. By the time they made it to the city walls, Jolie was a full month old. However, much to the delight of Ulrich and Marie, the locals were quite friendly. They didn't expect much of a welcome, especially considering that they were humans, Occitanians, and caring for a Kazuth all at the same time. They were proven considerably wrong.
Their settling in was, in stark contrast to the trip, quite quick. They asked around for a place that they could stay, and were immediately told of the few of them that had rooms open or the houses available for purchase. Their new neighbors were (when asked politely) happy to assist their moving in, taking note of the the two children that the mother needed to care for and the fact that only the father was particularly able to lift heavy things. Even so, with the combining factors of the neighbors' hospitality and the fact that they hadn't had to bring much coming together, it took only a few days for them to be completely unpacked.
Naturally, it would take longer than that to adjust mentally to the new location and culture. But with such kind people living among them, it couldn't be that difficult, could it? True, there was the matter of raising Jolie, and of informing her of her lost mother...but the former was not a new concept to Marie and they would deal with the latter when the time came.
Their circumstances were very promising. Gabrielle (barely 3 years old at the time) made fast friends with the local children and Jolie was safely in the care of her new mother. They needed only to keep their thoughts off of Katherine and her now-surely-dead husband.
At least he wasn't ailing anymore, right?
— Turbulence Part I — Have you ever been an only child? As a kid, many grow up with the idea that they are the most important. It's a bratty and selfish way of thinking, but some kids do grow up that way. However, there are other kids who think less of themselves. There are those who simply grow to expect a certain amount of attention, and become difficult when this attention is lost. Many things can get in the way of this attention.
A new child is one of them.
Yes, Gabrielle found herself the victim of this sort of familial change. It was not easy to adapt, though it never is. Though only 5 then, she began to notice that Jolie was getting essentially all of the attention of the parents. This was nothing abnormal. In any family, the youngest seems to be favored—often because it is the youngest that requires the most care, though, just as often, this causes a neglect of the other children.
She complained, threw fits, threw tantrums. She did whatever she could to get their attention. Her actions won success, but at the ire of her parents. It was beginning to get out of hand, and she was punished accordingly. The behavior only returned and returned, until finally the mother sat down with the child and forced her into conversation.
"It's not fair," she cried. "Why's that stupid cat better than me?"
Marie saw the pain in her daughter's eyes, read her tears like books. She responded quick, scooping the girl up into her arms. Gabrielle was still little, making this not too hard a task, but she was much bigger than Jolie. The tears coming from her daughter's big eyes didn't stop, but they slowed a bit.
"Why is she better, ma?"
"Did I ever tell you the story of how she became a part of our family?"
"No..."
She took a breath and began. "It was about two years ago," she calmly explained. "You would have been too young to remember it. It was the dead of winter..."
— Turbulence Part II — She wrapped up the story on a pleasant note, not dwelling too long on unfortunate details. "Still, none of that means she's better than you. You just need to be watched less. We trust you to be able to do certain things by yourself now that Jolie can't do on her own. Nothing more. Promise."
Gabrielle had cried out all of her sorrow while the story was being told. By the time her mother had ended, she was already better. However, something that her mother said made the previous conversation a secret—something just between the two of them. It cemented their bond and, in Gabrielle's mind, gave her an edge over her younger sister.
"Don't speak of any of this to Jolie, okay?"
Gabrielle nodded, and with that Marie set her down. After that unfortunate incident, Jolie and Gabrielle found themselves growing up in quite the happy environment. The neighbors were friendly, there was no malicious sibling rivalry (though there was some playful competition), and there were no Vinbergens come to slaughter their child. The years passed quick to their parents, though they felt slow to the kids themselves.
Jolie eight and Gabrielle ten, they would race atop the stone edge which prevented the innocent clumsy bystander from plunging down the mountain unexpectedly. Jolie always won, of course. Being a Kazuth, she possessed superior balance and speed. But that didn't stop Gabrielle from trying, and every so often she would speed along close enough to almost pass her. However, one day, she would have her success.
It was a race across the edge as they always did, just as forbidden as their parents always told them it was. They were having fun, though, and what was wrong with a little fun? Jolie rushed ahead as she always did, Gabrielle close behind her. But this time, Gabrielle had a secret. Her legs had grown the tiniest bit longer and she had been practicing her running. She darted up behind Jolie and nudged her aside just enough to push past her. Surprised by the sudden contact, Jolie tripped up a bit and sat on the wall to prevent herself from falling over the edge. Gabrielle ran past, glanced back at Jolie, and tripped up a bit herself.
She was less fortunate.
— Turbulence Part III — Jolie had never been afraid of heights before, but she most certainly was after that. Understandably so. When she wept her way to mom and dad and told them what happened, they joined her in mourning. She was buried at the bottom of the mountain and much of their fellow villagers joined them at the funeral. Pain enveloped Ulrich and Marie. They had lost their only child—only real child. All they had left was an adopted Kazuth.
Jolie got over it much quicker than her mother and father. It wasn't that she didn't care. She missed her big sister dearly. It was that she was more worried about her parents than sad about the loss. As they spent the days wondering what to do next, Jolie fetched them food, water, made them whatever they were too crushed of heart to get. She supported them carefully, believing that they would recover soon. And, happily, after time passed, they became less and less depressed. They realized that what they had then was still very great and enviable: a close little family in which love was shared. They gradually stopped focusing on what they had lost and started building up what they still had.
Yet, too much of anything is bad. They began to protect Jolie as though their lives depended on it, sheltering her from the outside and forbidding her to leave the house. The few friends she had made in the village asked if she could come out and play. They were turned away, of course, for any overprotective parent will see danger in almost anything. After all, Gabrielle was playing when the accident happened, wasn't she? And neither Ulrich nor Marie were going to allow that to happen again. The children dropped away when rejected enough times, and gave up entirely later on.
Jolie was grateful that she was being loved and protected, but wondered if all of it was too much. She asked and was given a book to keep as a diary, in which she recorded all the events that happened to her as far back as she could remember. She had been born with a fairly good memory and thus made a good chronicler. She also wrote of her disappointments, her worries, and her troubles.
There was one trouble in particular, though; one which made her think hard. Jolie had always assumed she was adopted, but her parents never told her. As well, where did they get her from? She couldn't remember an orphanage. What were her real parents like? Were they still around? Why would they give her up? She had to know.
— Excerpts —
2/15/786. Evening. Cloudy. Can't see the stars well.
I finally asked them where I came from. I guess I wasn't supposed to. Maybe I did something wrong or should have waited before asking. Or maybe there's a certain way I was supposed to do it. Either way, I guess I did it wrong. They at least told me I was adopted, but I sort of already knew that. My cheek still stings. I didn't think ma would do that. It was probably for my own good. They said as much. I believe them, though. I don't see how they're right, but I believe them.
They're fighting right now or something. Not hitting each other, obviously. But they don't sound happy. I guess this is my fault. I know, maybe tea will cheer them up. ~~~
It didn't. They closed their door so fast it made me drop the cup. Now they're even more mad and want me to clean up the mess. I don't mind cleaning, but I don't want them angry. Keep trying, Jolie.
2/26/786. Afternoon. Sunny and warm. Smells weird outside.
I tried again. I hope this doesn't become a habit. It's starting to hurt. Well, yes, on the inside, but mostly on the outside. I think I might be starting to bruise a little. They've been trying to make me a better person for the past few months, something about being the perfect child since I'm all they have. They're making me perfect my Occitanian and Common, how I walk, how I talk, how I sing, how I dance...it's all a little tiring! But I know this is for the best, because it's making me into a better girl. I don't dream about being a princess anymore. That was a long time ago. Still, sometimes I feel like one with this training. Maybe I'll go make some tea. ~~~
It's just occurred to me that my tail is really fluffy. I guess that's a silly thing to notice after all this time, but it's actually very in-the-way. Oh, well. This tea is tasty. Become a better person, Jolie.
9/26/787. Morning. Overcast and raining. Very pretty.
I hadn't the time to write lately, as my parents have kept me rather active with this new course. Balance. They've been hammering it into me for quite some time now, and I'm almost certain it is because of my elder sister's fate. At least it hasn't been literally! If they used a hammer, I don't think I'd be able to take it. I'm not that strong. Though sometimes I wish they didn't hit me in the first place. Habits are difficult to break, I suppose.
Depressing, depressing! I should be thinking positive, right? It isn't dignified of a lady to dwell on the negatives of life. Besides, I'm sure this is part of the training. Ah, sorry to keep this so short, but father says I must go to bed. I will make sure to write more in the future. Practice in the morning. Stay happy, Jolie.
1/18/790...I think.
It got worse. I've been able to recover no answers from my parents and scavenging up the details of my past seems a lost cause at this point. I hurt all over. They didn't stop—I wish they would stop. I want to ask one more time for sake of nostalgia, but I'm scared. They're getting better at this. Using bigger words, finding meaner names, hitting my weak spots. I have to get out of here. Father's gotten sick and can't leave his bed and mother must care for him, so I might make it to the door and leave safely. I have to. >-,
Tea calms the nerves. I need to think straight. I will flee to a neighbor's house and throw myself upon their mercy. I know all people are ruthless and cannot be trusted, but if I will be slaughtered there, it will be quicker than here. If their kindness is great enough, they will point me to asylum and grant me supplies. I hope. My name is rather lengthy. I must abbreviate it, lest I offend them. Perhaps an initialism. Mother and father have just fallen asleep. I can hear their snoring from all the way in here. If I am to leave, this will be the most opportune occasion.
Good luck, Java.
Relationships:
Taken from her journal:
Adyna is a bit too kind. It makes her a bit suspect, actually. I fear she may be attracted to me romantically as well, which, needless to say, is extremely worrisome. I'm not interested in women. Avoid.
Brenna is probably crazy. Ironic that I write this. Now I feel like Laeira. People say all the time that there's something wrong with her. I can't imagine how it must feel. She can barely remember a thing, though, so at least solace can be had in that fact. Still, it makes me feel bad.
Deven used to be the closest thing I had to an almost kind of father before he died. Loyal, kind; gave me food, money, shelter, and care. The first person to be truly kind to me that I can remember. I will never forget him.
Me. I don't like me. I don't like how I look or how I sound or anything about me, really. But Deven wanted me to speak and I'm sure he thought me pretty as well. I guess for his sake I should make changes. It would have been easier if he was still around, though.
Kira is a formidable adversary. I really can't read her very well. Or perhaps I am reading her perfectly and she is a master of deception. Broke my wrist and threatened worse when I tried to be her friend. Reminds me of my mother, and a lot like myself. Pushes me away no doubt because she fears she may be hurt.
The brother of Martyn, Kurt stays with him. They seem very close. I stayed with them once, as Martyn was kind enough to give me a place to sleep, but it was a horrible experience—I don't intend to repeat that anytime soon. They remind me too much of Gabrielle and I in previous years. I couldn't even sleep.
Laeira gives me a weird feeling. She tried to be nice around me, but she puts me on edge. Seems to think playing music and swimming constitutes meditation. Also seems to think I am crazy, and said as much to Deven, which I overheard. A poor first impression, no doubt. I just hope she isn't right.
Linera is prettier than I can ever hope to be. She tried to comfort me after Deven died. It didn't really help much, but her efforts did not go unappreciated. Other than that, I'm not entirely sure how I feel about her. I guess she tries to be nice. I haven't thought much about that.
Marcus is very obviously a scary person. He's a tiefling that I think is supposed to be evil. I haven't seen him do much, though, and he's in the bar all the time drinking. Probably has a lot of troubles. I think he tried to reach out to me once. I'm not sure. But given my track record with tieflings, it may be wise to keep my distance.
Kind. Very kind. Marielle knows of my heritage, but not of my history. She treats me with respect and kindness and there's probably more to her hidden under the surface. Proof that there are at least a few good souls left in this world.
Martyn is peculiar. Evidently he has a brother, but I've yet to speak much to him. Martyn and I have spoken occasionally, and I almost told him of my past before. Once offered me a place to stay. Very dangerous to be around, I'm certain. Probably because I may end up saying more than I want to. Avoid when possible.
Robyn seems to be my new guardian. I fear things may go as well as they did with Deven. She is very kind, and shares a painful past. I told her about my parents and my birthplace, but not my sister. I don't want anyone to know about my sister. Well, I didn't want her to know about those, either. My mind is clouded around her. I hope she doesn't die.
Stay away from this man. Don't know what he is or why he is here, but he is very obviously from nowhere I am aware of. A very suspect sort of person and very cunning.
Solus is probably a danger. Everyone seems to think he's a creepy person. Frequent visitor of the bar and likely a skilled magic user. Does something involved with dead bodies. Not quite sure what.
Stom Razel is the Captain of the Black Watch. Not to be confused with the Surnan Watch. Or the Black Hawks for that matter. He might be trustworthy. I really haven't bothered to figure out yet.
Lieutenant Colonel Volten or something. I was never completely sure about his rank, but he at least doesn't seem the deceitful sort. He protects the city and, by extension, its inhabitants. A fine model for his subordinates.
I've heard a little about this William Arkhauser. Apparently he saved the town a few times. I don't trust him, though. Extremely dangerous, and a bit scary, in my opinion.
Abilities:
Better-than-average hearing, balance, and running speed, even for a Kazuth.
Exceptional grasp of Common and the Vinbergen dialect of Occitanian.
Intelligent.
Good at reading intentions.
Exceptional social skills and sense of "proper" and "improper."
Defects:
Timidity to the point of obsession.
Severe distrust of beings sentient and nonsentient.
Social skills often dumped in fear.
Fear of heights more than 20 feet.
All of the normal shortcomings of a Kazuth of her age.
Inventory:
Warm clothes and a white woolen sweater.
A diary.
A cigar.
A satchel with some food in it.
A silver necklace.
A pair of white elbow gloves.
A beautiful white dress and matching coat.
A ring that wards off 10% of all damage. (Stacks to 20% with the following ring) (Bestowed by Deven)
A ring that wards off 10% of all fire damage. (Stacks to 20% with the preceding ring) (Bestowed by Deven)
8500 shillings.
Last edited by Hyperiant on Tue Feb 19, 2013 7:31 am; edited 41 times in total
Spadge Vengaboy
Posts : 167 Join date : 2012-02-04 Age : 32 Location : United States
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Sun Feb 19, 2012 9:02 am
Hate you for ending it there. Awesome story. I can't accept hard enough.
Hyperiant Vengaboy
Posts : 157 Join date : 2012-02-09
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Sun Feb 19, 2012 5:34 pm
Spadge wrote:
Hate you for ending it there. Awesome story. I can't accept hard enough.
Thanks for the vote of confidence.
I've still got three or four more parts to do. There'll be more for you to read, if you're really enjoying it. I've been adding parts episodically, so check back every day or so for a new part until I'm finished, if you like.
Cakebread Vengaboy
Posts : 198 Join date : 2012-02-04
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Sun Feb 19, 2012 8:49 pm
WTF IS THAT MOVING OH GOD
Aside from that which creeped me out a bit
Acceptemente
Themodtester Scrublet
Posts : 48 Join date : 2012-02-04 Age : 27 Location : Earth.
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 12:41 am
14 and Kazuth. /twitch. Sure, why not. Accept.
Christoph Almost-Member
Posts : 75 Join date : 2012-02-04
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 3:50 am
For what it's worth, I accept this character. Probably because it reminds me of a character idea I had.
Guest Guest
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 4:21 am
This isn't finished you massive pedophiles. Stop accepting unfinished characters. And good god she won't suck your dick if you pass an accept, so you might as well withdraw them all. Kidding. Finish this character and then I'll pass my judgment.
Guest Guest
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 4:25 am
Jacque wrote:
Kidding. Finish this character and then I'll pass my judgment.
This, a million times this. At the moment it's a picture and a backstory, you guys.
Spadge Vengaboy
Posts : 167 Join date : 2012-02-04 Age : 32 Location : United States
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 5:18 am
Krug wrote:
Jacque wrote:
Kidding. Finish this character and then I'll pass my judgment.
This, a million times this. At the moment it's a picture and a backstory, you guys.
Yeah, but it's a good backstory. Besides, what can a 14 year-old do in ways of combat?
I wasn't here for the child super mages or whatever that business was before the skip, so I'll withdraw my accept until it's done.
Guest Guest
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 5:32 am
Quote :
Yeah, but it's a good backstory.
i have no idea what the hell even happened, the narrative style is so weird that you can't make out any actual biography
Psyche Keeper of the Thunderboner, Protector of the Hatefuck Chalice
Posts : 141 Join date : 2012-02-04 Location : Fuckshit Creek
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 6:06 am
It's been years since I explained my hatred for child characters and how they don't work as independant people, subject to character development and passive rp, but I'm not going to deny this character outright because of it. I'm going to withhold my judgement indefinitely and the best I can say is 'good luck with this.'
Hyperiant Vengaboy
Posts : 157 Join date : 2012-02-09
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:14 am
Psyche wrote:
It's been years since I explained my hatred for child characters and how they don't work as independant people, subject to character development and passive rp, but I'm not going to deny this character outright because of it. I'm going to withhold my judgement indefinitely and the best I can say is 'good luck with this.'
Noble move, sock.
Spadge wrote:
Yeah, but it's a good backstory. Besides, what can a 14 year-old do in ways of combat?
I wasn't here for the child super mages or whatever that business was before the skip, so I'll withdraw my accept until it's done.
You'll find this out when I post her skills/abilities, but she really can't do anything but run. No magic, no sword, no bow, no training. Even her punches don't hurt.
Spadge Vengaboy
Posts : 167 Join date : 2012-02-04 Age : 32 Location : United States
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 20, 2012 7:59 am
Quote :
You'll find this out when I post her skills/abilities, but she really can't do anything but run. No magic, no sword, no bow, no training. Even her punches don't hurt.
That's what I assumed, but it was a mistake to make an accept based on an assumption. :/
Backstory finished. Now to put down her inventory/abilities.
Guest Guest
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Sat Feb 25, 2012 1:54 am
WOW. Do you want us to read all that? Jesus fucking christ. Perhaps a summary would be cool, because you could have slipped any OP shit in that backstory and we wouldn't know anything about it. Again, think of a summary.
Guest Guest
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Sat Feb 25, 2012 1:58 am
Jacque wrote:
WOW. Do you want us to read all that? Jesus fucking christ. Perhaps a summary would be cool, because you could have slipped any OP shit in that backstory and we wouldn't know anything about it. Again, think of a summary.
I'm sure the skills and abilities section would summarise all of the things she picked up, so we didn't miss anything. Chill out, bro.
Hyperiant Vengaboy
Posts : 157 Join date : 2012-02-09
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Sat Feb 25, 2012 9:29 am
Abilities, defects, and inventory added. Character is now NON-WIP (but changes may still be made if necessary).
Christoph Almost-Member
Posts : 75 Join date : 2012-02-04
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Sun Feb 26, 2012 6:12 am
Jacque wrote:
WOW. Do you want us to read all that? Jesus fucking christ. Perhaps a summary would be cool, because you could have slipped any OP shit in that backstory and we wouldn't know anything about it. Again, think of a summary.
I'm not really sure how to react to that comment. Short Story Length Backstory /=/ Bad.
Jackxter Giant Scrub
Posts : 65 Join date : 2012-02-20
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 27, 2012 2:05 am
I like the bio :3.
Hyperiant Vengaboy
Posts : 157 Join date : 2012-02-09
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 27, 2012 6:34 am
Thank you.
Also, anyone who's accepted this in the past will need to do so again, as accepts aren't valid until the character is done (which it is). So far she has no valid accepts.
Themodtester Scrublet
Posts : 48 Join date : 2012-02-04 Age : 27 Location : Earth.
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 27, 2012 6:50 am
I'll go with an accept. even though I've no idea what to think of underaged kiddos in the RP, oh well.
Guest Guest
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 27, 2012 8:24 am
Quote :
underaged kiddos in the RP
Hyperiant Vengaboy
Posts : 157 Join date : 2012-02-09
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 27, 2012 8:31 am
Christoph Almost-Member
Posts : 75 Join date : 2012-02-04
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 27, 2012 8:33 am
Christoph wrote:
For what it's worth, I accept this character. Probably because it reminds me of a character idea I had.
Themodtester Scrublet
Posts : 48 Join date : 2012-02-04 Age : 27 Location : Earth.
Subject: Re: Jolie-Astrella Violetta Abrielle Mon Feb 27, 2012 8:54 am
