Oph'elie the Mad

Subject: Oph'elie the Mad Fri Dec 14, 2012 11:20 am

Physicality

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Biography

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Many are touched by the stars, the gods of madness, but not many as much as dear Oph'elie, an Álfar girl brought up in the grand city of Te'clis. Raised dirt poor from birth, Oph'elie learned many roguish behaviours, such as sneaking and thieving. When she became of age, her father bestowed upon her a bow, made from yew which he had stolen from a local bowyer and took her hunting. She quickly fell in love with the noble sport and over the next hundred years grew to be renowned as a great hunter in the city's commercial districts. Content with her life, Oph'elie had no plans other than to hunt for the rest of her life.

A week before the holy days of atonement, Oph'elie received a note, slipped underneath her doorway in a sealed envelope. Breaking the seal, Oph'elie began to read of the letter.

Letter wrote:

It has come to our attention that you are known amongst the merchants as a grand hunter, in conjunction with the days of atonement, we wish to purchase your services to prepare for a grand offering to the trinity, a very befitting reward awaits your arrival with meat in proportion to the size of twelve grown stag. We will send a representative of ours to your household on the eve of the first day to procure the flesh.

*The note is mysteriously left unsigned*

Slightly more than a tonne of meat. So Oph'elie left for the forests everyday for the next week; fueled by the promise of a grand treasure. Unbeknownst to her that the grand treasure that equaled 2400 pounds would begin a cycle of destructive behaviors, ultimately driving her to madness.

After striking down her twelfth stag, and hauling the load back to her household, Oph'elie rested for several hours. When she awoke a loud pounding noise permeated her room, dragging herself to her feet and standing before the front door, she opened it. A masked man, draped in a cloak stood beyond the doorway accompanied by two larger men with similar masks, forcing his way inside, the man set a small box upon the dining table and commanded the two men to remove the meat from Oph'elie's possession.

When the man had left, Oph'elie opened the small box that was left, surely this could not be the grand treasure she had killed a tonne of stag for. Inside the box was an amulet, a small round disk of orium silver on a chain of brass. Etched on the face of the coin is a symbol, a rather powerful one, the mark of Nazu.

Bleeding it's way into the mortal realm, Nazu's influence causes an inexplicable madness. Firstly brought on in a wave of nightmares depicting herself pouring the blood of man and elf alike in a ritualistic manner on an altar to a hidden deity. Later being influenced during the daytime, with impulses to kill, managing to hold back her impulsive behavior by hunting during the day, the madness manifested itself in stronger and stronger forms. The bloodlust that grew within her now, hid itself behind a religious motive.

Compelled by the affliction brought upon her by Nazu, Oph'elie became consumed by the insanity, leading her to slaughter men, women, and elf alike on an altar on the twentieth of every month. Establishing an altar to what she calls. the "Unknown", hidden deep in the forests, and disposing of the remains by filling their pockets with lead weights and laying them to rest under the surface of nearby lakes. Over an unknown period of time, nearly thirty men and women were slain by Oph'elie's hand. Finally being pursued with fervor by the town guard, Oph'elie left Te'clis for another large city, unlike those of Ahdsur, this new city should be diverse, with a large range of difficultly and races. So, Oph'elie left for Sanctimonia and moreover, Surna.

Inventory

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Skills

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Ailments

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Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Mon Dec 17, 2012 9:06 am

Quote :: 1,500 Nobles
30 pounds of pure gold coins.

That... is a lot... a lot... of money.

Like... a lot. Like a hundred fifty thousand shillings a lot.

In addition to this being a bit of a high number for me to give an approval for, I also think I should bring up something of mention about leather. Some leathers are better than others for different things, I believe Cow leather is in fact the best in terms of tensile strength at exterior hardness, kangaroo leather being the most flexible and the most elastic (also the leather used for Indiana Jones Whips), and bear being... well, badass as a status symbol, but truth be told, I haven't seen any reports or anything to suggest it's any better than any other in any facet, other than being naturally available in a large, thick amount due to the animal it's harvested from.

Human flesh, and leather thereof, may not be as functional as other leathers, as some leathers aren't as functional as others. I'm just curious as to how well human leather would perform, not turned off to by the idea.

I sort of like characters that have a particular bonus to their abilities in certain situations, however, I also like to see these abilities capped so they can't reach a rediculously high buff. Perhaps set a cap for her damage bonus / penalty?

I like the design, just a few nicks and tucks and I think we'll be good to go.

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Tue Dec 18, 2012 9:03 am

Dominator046 wrote:

Quote :: 1,500 Nobles
30 pounds of pure gold coins.

That... is a lot... a lot... of money.

Like... a lot. Like a hundred fifty thousand shillings a lot.

In addition to this being a bit of a high number for me to give an approval for, I also think I should bring up something of mention about leather. Some leathers are better than others for different things, I believe Cow leather is in fact the best in terms of tensile strength at exterior hardness, kangaroo leather being the most flexible and the most elastic (also the leather used for Indiana Jones Whips), and bear being... well, badass as a status symbol, but truth be told, I haven't seen any reports or anything to suggest it's any better than any other in any facet, other than being naturally available in a large, thick amount due to the animal it's harvested from.

Human flesh, and leather thereof, may not be as functional as other leathers, as some leathers aren't as functional as others. I'm just curious as to how well human leather would perform, not turned off to by the idea.

I sort of like characters that have a particular bonus to their abilities in certain situations, however, I also like to see these abilities capped so they can't reach a rediculously high buff. Perhaps set a cap for her damage bonus / penalty?

I like the design, just a few nicks and tucks and I think we'll be good to go.

We are talking about, and I cannot stress this enough, the HEIR to one of the noble houses of Ahdsur.

As far as human leather goes, I said it was the "finest"

That Book With All The Words wrote:: fine
adjective
fin·er fin·est
Definition of FINE
1
: free from impurity
2
a : very thin in gauge or texture <fine thread>
b : not coarse <fine sand>
3
: delicate, subtle, or sensitive in quality, perception, or discrimination <a fine distinction>
4
: superior in kind, quality, or appearance : excellent <a fine job> <a fine day> <fine wines>

Also,

http://www.humanleather.co.uk/faqs.html wrote:: Human leather is made from real full thickness human skin. Just like animal leather products, produced from lesser animals, our raw human skin is transformed into the finest grade human leather by using a traditional tanning process. However, human leather is the finest grain leather that is obtainable.

It is free from defects and has the smallest grain size which makes it the smoothest, softest leather on Earth.

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Mon Dec 24, 2012 1:17 pm

bumpidy bump bump bumpidy bump bump look at that Frosty go.

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Sun Feb 03, 2013 3:53 pm

Spoiler:

noodle wrote:: Raised dirt poor from birth...

When she became of age, her father bought her a bow...

It strikes me as odd that she went from being raised dirt poor, straight to her father being able to afford a bow. Even in the current age of firearms a bow would cost money that could otherwise be spent on things like food and clothing. Perhaps the bow was gained some other way, like theft?

noodle wrote:: Quickly in Te'clis she became known as Duskinner, and was frequently sought after every day and night. She took the skins of the unfortunate souls whom she hunted, and crafted them into fine leather goods, which she sold locally to unknowing consumers...

9:44 PM - Spadge: Te'clis is an elven city, correct?
9:44 PM - Pat: Yes
9:44 PM - Pat: Elven Capitol
9:45 PM - Spadge: human population?
9:45 PM - Pat: Some, yeah. Especially in recent years
9:45 PM - Pat: The Elves generally don't want other races living in the city proper, but there are 'foreign' districts set up in most cities
9:46 PM - Pat: tending to be much more populated and worse off than the actual cities

It's not explicitly stated in your bio but most of your leather gear is crafted from human skin. This makes me think Oph'elie hunts mostly humans in an elven city, which made me wonder. Does she have some sort of personal grudge against humans in general? Some childhood trauma?

I'm also curious as to how she sells her human leather when she's hunted for day and night be the authorities. Is she proficient with disguises?

noodle wrote:: Voices contradicted themselves in Oph'elie's mind and she approached the child, dagger in hand, and with a piercing cry, the child had passed on. Within moments two guards burst into the nursery, and found the window ajar and a gentle breeze filling the room, and in the crib, nothing, for Oph'elie had not killed the child, but rather took the child with her.

What prompted her to make such a (let's call it pragmatic) decision? It seems out of character for someone who is supposed to be a mad, bloodthirsty murderer who skins people and then puts the skins into circulation. Her primary motivation seemed to be that conventional game was boring, not a desire for riches.

noodle wrote:: The next day a ransom note was delivered by courier for the child, thirty pounds of gold for the infant, that is, fifteen-hundred nobles, and a government escort to the mainland. The head of the house swiftly arranged for a ship to take the child and Oph'elie to the mainland, to the country of Sanctimonia, when the woman slept, the guards were instructed to slay her, and take the infant back to Ahdsur, and thusly, the woman slept, and a soldier ran his sword through her cot, and as blood seeped from the cot, the soldier sheathed his sword and left the room.

At this time, Oph'elie slipped down from her resting place in the crows-nest, and found her cot bathed in infant's blood. She hurried to the captain and spoke of the murder, and he charged the soldiers with mutiny as maritime law dictates, and the soldiers were executed. The captain, docked his ship in Sanctimonia, allowed Oph'elie her cargo of gold, and she sent off down the river to Surna, the Catalyst of Fates.

So the head of the noble house, whose eldest son was kidnapped by by an infamous psychopathic murderer, did not inform the ship's crew of whom they were transporting? Let alone offer the crew the ransom of thirty pounds of gold as a reward for the safe return of their son, and the head of said kidnapper?

Then the unusually honorable sailors, after killing the paid soldiers when they mistakenly murder the child, decide not to double cross the wanted criminal and keep the thirty pounds of gold for themselves to live out their lives in comfort as far from Ahdsur as humanly possible?

noodle wrote:: 1,500 Nobles
30 pounds of pure gold coins.

How does she carry it? In burlap (or human leather) sacks thrown over her shoulder, or on a horse? With 1,500 coins in total, she must be jingling with every step. Thirty pounds of gold is also kind of giant flashing "ROB ME" sign complete with whistles and party poppers. Was her journey to Surna one massive spree of betrayal and murder, with everyone who spied her riches succumbing to their greed?

All in all, it's a very interesting Character. I feel that the amount of gold she carries is too much, especially considered the apparent ease of her journey to Surna while carrying such a tempting sum. Her skills make her powerful, but I feel they're somewhat justified considering her age. My judgement is pending for the time being.

Tryhard Posts : 602 Join date : 2012-02-06

Yeah, I shouldn't be doing this, but...

noodle wrote:: We are talking about, and I cannot stress this enough, the HEIR to one of the noble houses of Ahdsur.

You can try and justify it, but the only real reason this character has 1,500 nobles is because you established her as having 1,500 nobles with the biography you wrote. The way she went about obtaining them is somewhat questionable, too...

What made her decide to start killing people? Millions of elves in Aeria are content with hunting just animals for all of their very long lives, and there's nothing to suggest she would have reason to simply become a killer. It's not something the average person does on a whim. So maybe she's just plain nuts. I guess that makes sense, sort of.
It's interesting that no one ever tried to stop her in her killing spree. Working alone, it can be very difficult to get away with these kinds of things.
Her mad quest leads her to spontaneously decide to hunt and kill some noble. The details here are extremely lacking, she just sneaks into some guy's house, kills the guards, and makes off with an infant like a pro. For no reason.
Now here's where the story gets really shaky. She gets on a ship to the mainland as part of the ransom agreement, presumably to escape the authorities from Ahdsur (who in elven-controlled Sanctimonia would probably still be around) and fools the guards by... placing the baby in her cot. This guard, working alone (even though just prior it said everyone was in on it) stabs the cot, kills the kid, and walks away without checking to see what he just did. Not only does the baby in the cot fool him, he doesn't think to check and make sure Oph'elie is dead. What a dumbass.
Worse still, she sneaks over to the captain, tells him what happened, and he... charges his crew with mutiny? The person he and his crew was hired to assassinate is standing right there in front of him and he just lets her go and punishes his crew who stupidly killed the very person they were supposed to protect. They've been at sea for far too long, I think. Even worse still, the captain knows about her gold but is apparently completely selfless on top of being a drooling buffoon.
She then goes to Surna, which is nowhere near the coast, for no real reason. You could at least try to think of something.

Overall, this story isn't just unrealistic (which, in a fantasy setting, can be acceptable to a point). It's poorly thought out. It just feels rushed, almost lazy. You want a super-wealthy, highly-skilled assassin without doing your homework? I suggest playing Assassin's Creed. Or Thief, if you like old-school games.

Also, thanks for that very creepy website link. I can't say I trust any of their claims, any more than I would trust a coffee producer that claims to make the best coffee in the world. And these guys make human leather. I have to go talk to the FBI now.

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Tue Feb 05, 2013 6:56 am

Fixed Spadge's issue with the bow.
Removed the human leather issue.
Edited motive
Removed the issue with the nobles.
Toned down wealth

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Tue Feb 05, 2013 7:18 am

i quite enjoy the new direction, and I see no major issues... still a lot of money... but perhaps some people are able to start with such, and can be allowed to have such a character based on their roleplaying ability. From what I've seen on the server, thirty nobles isn't terribly drastic; maybe she should've already spent some, but, it's not a deal breaker for me.

HOWEVER, there is one lore contradiction that needs addressed. To what is the altar dedicated to? Though there are those who follow Nazu, she doesn't directly bestow blessing, nor does she acknowledge followers. As I discussed with Pat with the Wargs, they work because they have a religious tie to Nazu just as they have with each other; it's business. It helps them, it brings them together, and they thrive in it. they may honor her, some more than others, but I don't think any, perhaps save for the leader, revere Nazu much more than a sort of helpful business partner.

Sure, she can be insane and revel in her insanity and thank Nazu for it, but I wanted to establish that that's all that it would be.

Now... when I get down to writing the lore on VELECAR... well, he may more reward your violent tendencies. = 3

Oh hell, I'll toss you the accept. = P

Vengaboy Posts : 198 Join date : 2012-02-04

It seems kosher now.
I'll chip in an accept.

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Tue Feb 05, 2013 11:00 am

Pending, want to see the roleplay.

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Tue Feb 05, 2013 11:09 am

I really like the new biography and the way it flows. This has my accept, assuming it doesn't become a character based around PKs.

Only other thing I would like addressed is Dom's concern. Is she supposed to be receiving a blessing for her sacrifices, or is it simply a compulsion of her madness?

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Tue Feb 05, 2013 11:12 am

Spadge wrote:: I really like the new biography and the way it flows. This has my accept, assuming it doesn't become a character based around PKs.

Only other thing I would like addressed is Dom's concern. Is she supposed to be receiving a blessing for her sacrifices, or is it simply a compulsion of her madness?

I won't ever force a PK when I kill, but when I kill it'll be an actual RPd death.

Secondly, that seems like an IC question ;)

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Tue Feb 05, 2013 12:17 pm

Accepted from me after examples of RP.

Subject: Re: Oph'elie the Mad Tue Feb 05, 2013 12:49 pm

Sure, I don't see why not.