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 Stephano Halburg (Application)

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5 posters
AuthorMessage
kiwi_doom
Scrublet
kiwi_doom


Posts : 1
Join date : 2012-03-01

Stephano Halburg (Application) Empty
PostSubject: Stephano Halburg (Application)   Stephano Halburg (Application) EmptyThu Mar 01, 2012 10:38 am

Basic Information

Full Name: Stephano Halburg
Nicknames: Shadow Merger.
Gender: Male
Age: 26
Race: Tiefling
Language: Common
Occupation: Guild Leader / Assassin / Thief


Appearance

Hair Colour: Black
Hair Style: Short
Eye Colour: Dark Red
Skin Tone: Slightly Tanned
Height: 5'10
Body Type: Well Built, Athletic.
Facial Features: Short Sharp Horns, Gottee, Earring in Right Ear

Skills

Light Footed
Master of Stealth
Expert Bowman
Master of Short Swords and Daggers
Charismatic
Acrobatic

Background Story

Stephano was born a Tiefling, his parents in fear of what he might become, abandoned him, he was took in by a group of young thieves who lived in squaller, back streets and abanandoned buildings. They looked after him untill he was 4, then he was considered old enough to thieve and had to find his own food, he never grew too close to anyone in the gang, he still doesn't know why.
At the age of 14, he started to steal jewelery and sell it else where for half the price, he began to be regonized by small groups of experienced thieves, and by 16 he joined a group of 18. He worked his way up till he was highly respected, because of his race he was far better at sneaking and staying silent. At 19 he decided he was too good for the group and left, but of course he stole all that he good. He trained himself to use the bow, and would ambush travelling traders or lone adventuerers. He quickly began an expert with the bow and daggers.
He decided to form an organization of assassins and thieves at 22, and slowly grew his newly found home into a large guild of highly skilled members.

This leaves him off where he is now, whether his story continues is up to you.

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PhoenixRhapsody
Vengaboy
PhoenixRhapsody


Posts : 240
Join date : 2012-02-20
Location : Texas, Y'all

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PostSubject: Re: Stephano Halburg (Application)   Stephano Halburg (Application) EmptyThu Mar 01, 2012 10:51 am

All the basic information is fine, but more detail needs to be put into the background.

Why did the gang take him off the streets? How did he manage to earn the thieves' respect as a Tiefling?

Another problem lies with him teaching himself to use a bow. Where did he get a bow? Did he steal the arrows right off a person's back? Is he a murderer?

Last problem I see is that information on both his inventory and stats are severely lacking. How strong is he compared to a human? Can he disappear in the dark? Where did he get his stuff? Try looking at some of the accepted characters' pages for some idea of what is still needed.
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Psyche
Keeper of the Thunderboner, Protector of the Hatefuck Chalice
Psyche


Posts : 141
Join date : 2012-02-04
Location : Fuckshit Creek

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PostSubject: Re: Stephano Halburg (Application)   Stephano Halburg (Application) EmptyThu Mar 01, 2012 11:01 am

Welcome to Olden. As a new member I have no way of gauging how responsible a roleplayer you are, and am not inclined to trust you with this sort of character.

The page flat-out that the character is a master of espionage and assassination. Newer players are encouraged to start with simpler characters, more capable of growth and character development, as we've had countless problems with people going on power-trips before. Assuring me that you won't do anything irresponsible or crazy with this character doesn't help, either. This is not a personal thing.

It's the exact same issue with being the head of a guild of talented assassins and thieves. This character would have deadly NPC's to his beck and call. There is already an assassin's guild in Surna, anyways. Not that it's any good.

For these reasons, I'm afraid I'll have to deny.
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BooM
Archmage
BooM


Posts : 629
Join date : 2012-02-22
Age : 29
Location : Paradise City, Florida

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PostSubject: Re: Stephano Halburg (Application)   Stephano Halburg (Application) EmptyThu Mar 01, 2012 11:14 am

Psyche wrote:
Welcome to Olden. As a new member I have no way of gauging how responsible a roleplayer you are, and am not inclined to trust you with this sort of character.

The page flat-out that the character is a master of espionage and assassination. Newer players are encouraged to start with simpler characters, more capable of growth and character development, as we've had countless problems with people going on power-trips before. Assuring me that you won't do anything irresponsible or crazy with this character doesn't help, either. This is not a personal thing.

It's the exact same issue with being the head of a guild of talented assassins and thieves. This character would have deadly NPC's to his beck and call. There is already an assassin's guild in Surna, anyways. Not that it's any good.

For these reasons, I'm afraid I'll have to deny.

What Psyche says pretty much rounds it up. Among that there are other details such as Tieflings should be complete outcasts to society and shouldn't really be respected anywhere and the more important one, being able to apply for a Tiefling. Tiefling is request only and can only be given by Kruggly. Denied, try to make a more simple and basic character first.
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Munroe
Tryhard
Munroe


Posts : 602
Join date : 2012-02-06

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PostSubject: Re: Stephano Halburg (Application)   Stephano Halburg (Application) EmptySun Mar 18, 2012 6:02 am

Denied, for the reasons Psyche said. Does kiwi_doom even play here any more?
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BooM
Archmage
BooM


Posts : 629
Join date : 2012-02-22
Age : 29
Location : Paradise City, Florida

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PostSubject: Re: Stephano Halburg (Application)   Stephano Halburg (Application) EmptySun Mar 18, 2012 6:20 am

no he doesnt
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Guest
Guest
Anonymous



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PostSubject: Re: Stephano Halburg (Application)   Stephano Halburg (Application) EmptySun Mar 18, 2012 6:25 am

Quote :
Tiefling is request only and can only be given by Kruggly.

THE LAW.
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